The Power of Positive Self-Talk + 5 beliefs for 2025

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In this week's episode of the podcast, we’re diving into one of the most transformative concepts for ambitious working moms - how the thoughts you think about yourself impact your ability to feel balanced and in control.

I’ll share 5 powerful self-concepts to cultivate in 2025 that will elevate your confidence, reduce guilt, and help you align your internal dialogue with the amazing life you’re building.

Plus, I’ll give you practical tips for practicing these empowering thoughts daily. Whether you’ve ever struggled with self-doubt, people-pleasing, or feeling like you’re not enough, this episode is a must-listen.  

Topics in this episode:

  • The connection between self-concept and achieving true work-life balance. 

  • 5 empowering self-concepts to embrace for a fulfilling life. 

  • Daily practices to build confidence and reduce negative self-talk. 

  • How to align your internal beliefs with your external accomplishments. 

  • Why practicing intentional thoughts can change how you feel about yourself. 

Show Notes & References:

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Transcript

Intro

The most important thoughts that you think all day are, the thoughts that you have about yourself. In a balanced life, your internal self must match your external meaning. It doesn't matter how good you are at holding to your boundaries or shutting down work to be with your family. If your internal dialogue is negative and you're constantly feeling like you're not enough or you're guilty or you're feeling overwhelmed, then you cannot create a life that feels balanced. Your internal dialogue must make you feel amazing and good at what you do and satisfied and like you're doing enough always. Today on the podcast, I'm talking about what it takes to elevate your thoughts that you have about yourself so that you feel amazing, no matter your circumstance. I'll be offering five powerful thoughts to start cultivating in 2025 that are gonna create a foundation of balance for you and offer a few very practical ways to start cultivating those thoughts more intentionally. If you've ever struggled with confidence or self doubt or self assurance, then this is a podcast for you. Are you ready? Let's get to it.

Welcome to the Ambitious and Balanced Working Moms Podcast, your go to resource for integrating your career ambitions with life as a mom. I'm distilling down thousands of coaching conversations I've had with working moms just like you, along with my own personal experience as a mom of two and sharing the most effective tools and strategies to help you quickly feel calm, confident, and in control of your ambitious working mom life. You ready? Let's get to it.

A Blustery Day and a Warm Cup of Tea

Hello, hello working moms. I am really excited to be with you today. It is a blustery day here in the San Francisco Bay Area—the winds are crazy, literally trees are swaying.

I love days like this. There’s not a cloud in the sky, but the trees are going oo. And I get to bundle up, have a warm cup of tea—it’s just so lovely.

And in this case, you’re probably bundling up, listening to this podcast episode, and taking a few minutes for yourself—which I absolutely love. I am honored that you listen to this podcast and find it useful.

Doors Opening Soon for Ambitious & Balanced

Because you’re one of those people, I want to make sure you know about the next cohort of my Ambitious and Balanced group coaching program.

The first day is February 24th, but the doors open a week from today. I want to make sure you’ve gotten your name on the waitlist, because if you decide to join, there’s a special offer just for you.

You can find out more about the program, dates, and all the details by going to rebeccaolsoncoaching.com/ambitiousandbalanced. Click on one of the links that says join the waitlist and add your name.

If you don’t know much about this program, let me give you a little bit of information before we jump into today’s topic.

It’s a three-month program where you are going to learn how to prioritize yourself and your family and still feel like you’re crushing it at work.

It is a both/and type of program. This is the only work-life balance program I’ve ever known—or seen—that in such a short period of time teaches you the tools and concepts, and helps you implement exactly what’s necessary to live a sustainably balanced life.

The Four Priorities of a Balanced Life

In the program, we focus on four foundational priorities:

  • Focused family time

  • Uninterrupted work time

  • Me time

  • Off-work time

And I’m going to teach you how to stop trying to squeeze those things into your schedule—and instead, make them your top priority, and fit the rest of your life around them.

This is a small group coaching program. I only take 10 women into the program because I want to personally track your progress and make sure everyone has the opportunity to get supported and coached by me as needed over the three months.

So again—you’re going to want to get on the waitlist. You’re going to want this special bonus if you sign up. You can get all the information on my website, and click one of the buttons that says Put me on the waitlist to be the first to know.

Make 2025 the Year You Finally Feel Balanced

Doors open a week from today, and I’m so excited. Grab a friend, grab a coworker, and do this together.

Make 2025 the year you:

  • Put a balanced life at the top of your list

  • Stop giving your family the leftovers

  • Let go of guilt and stress

  • Finally create the balanced life you’ve always longed for

One of the Most Foundational Concepts: Your Self-Concept

All right, so as I said, we’re going to be talking about a concept today that is really important in the Ambitious and Balanced program. It’s one of the foundational concepts I teach: your self-concept.

Now, what I mean by your self-concept—if you don’t know that term—it’s kind of a “coachy” term. So I want to make sure I explain it to you.

Your self-concept is essentially the concepts you have about yourself, or the beliefs you have about yourself.

Why Your Thoughts Matter More Than You Think

One of the concepts we talk about a lot here on the podcast is how important your thoughts—or your beliefs—are in creating a balanced life.

Other ways we could say this are: your mindset, your perspective, the words that go through your head. Your thoughts. Your beliefs. Your concepts. Those are essentially all saying the same thing: the things that go through your head.

Your mindset plays a huge role in how you live your life. The way you think impacts the way you feel. And the way you feel is what drives you to prioritize your life and goals—sometimes in the way you want, and sometimes in the way you don’t.

The Most Important Thoughts You’ll Ever Think

When it comes to your thinking, the most important thoughts you think all day are the thoughts you have about yourself.

The way you think about yourself dictates the way you feel about yourself. And when you are living a balanced life, the way you feel about yourself is really, really important.

Why External Balance Isn’t Enough

You could be doing everything right—prioritizing your health, time for yourself, rest, family, off-work time, and not logging back on. You could be doing all the things you know you’re supposed to be doing.

But if your internal dialogue is crappy—if you’re beating yourself up, feeling like you’re not enough, telling yourself you should be doing more, fearing you’re letting people down, feeling guilty for your choices—you cannot feel balanced.

Yes, the way you prioritize your time is important in creating balance. But even more important than that is what you say to yourself as you live your life.

When Success Still Doesn’t Feel Good

This is why so often women come to me and say:
“I have the exact life I always dreamed of. I’ve reached all my goals. And yet, I don’t feel happy.”

It’s because the way they’re thinking about themselves is not in alignment with the goodness of the life they’ve created.

Your external life—the choices you make about your time, priorities, and boundaries—must match your internal life—the way you think and feel about yourself and your life.

If your internal and external life don’t match, there’s no possible way to experience true balance.

Thoughts Are a Choice—And That’s Freeing

I’ll say it again: the most important words that go through your head are the words you choose to think about yourself.

Understanding that your thoughts are a choice is an important part of realizing the impact your words have. Thoughts don’t just happen to you—you cultivate them. You choose them daily. You practice them.

And remember: your thoughts are not truth. They are not your reality. They’re just a perspective.

This is one of the most freeing things to realize—because when you understand that you don’t have to believe everything your brain thinks, you free yourself up to choose more positive, intentional thoughts.

When you choose what to believe about yourself, your work, your decisions, and your time, you give yourself the power to feel more joyful, more balanced, more satisfied.

That’s what creates a balanced life: not just how you spend your time, but what you decide to believe about yourself every single day.

When “I Didn’t Get Enough Done” Is Just a Thought

Let me give you an example.

If you got two things done today and had hoped to get ten, your brain is probably going to tell you that you didn’t get enough done and should have done more. You’ll feel guilty. You might feel stressed or overwhelmed—because you simply didn’t get everything done you wanted to.

But those are just your first thoughts.

Instead of thinking “I didn’t get enough done today”, you could think:
“I got exactly what I meant to get done today. I’m on top of the things that are most important. I’ll figure out how to take care of the rest.”

There are so many different thoughts you could choose, instead of “I’m behind, I didn’t get enough done, I’m letting people down.”

It’s all perspective. These are just thoughts, just mindsets.

Choosing Useful Beliefs

When you’re constantly thinking “I’m behind, I’m not enough, I’m failing”—it makes you feel terrible about yourself.

Those thoughts are not useful to you. That self-concept, those beliefs, are not useful.

Versus believing: “I’m someone who always gets done exactly what needs to get done, and I’m totally capable of figuring out the rest.”

That is powerful.

Ultimately, you just get to choose which set of thoughts you’re going to believe today.

Why Circumstances Don’t Dictate Balance

Your circumstances never dictate what you think. Of course, it’s easier to believe you’re on top of everything when you get everything done.

But even if you only get one thing done today, you could still choose to believe:

  • “I’ve got it all under control.”

  • “I’m focusing on the best things.”

  • “I know exactly what matters most.”

Those thoughts might be harder to believe at first—but they are still available to you, no matter what the circumstances are.

What an Elevated Self-Concept Looks Like

Let me give you some tangible examples of why this matters.

Someone with an elevated self-concept—meaning they believe really positive, empowering thoughts about themselves most of the time—might be described as confident or self-assured.

Think of someone in your life you’d describe that way.

That person:

  • Cares a lot less about what other people think.

  • Doesn’t dwell on the fear of disappointing others.

  • Is more willing to fail, put themselves out there, and try new things.

  • Believes in themselves no matter what—whether they succeed or fail.

Because of that, they move faster, go after bigger things, make faster decisions, and don’t spin in indecision. They feel much more in control of their life—because they are in the driver’s seat, making decisions for themselves, their goals, and their family.

Can you see how a balanced life is so much easier for this person? They’re not walking on eggshells around everyone, searching for validation, or trying to get everything right all the time.

What a Low Self-Concept Looks Like

On the other hand, someone with a low self-concept—where their self-belief wavers depending on other people’s opinions or how much they accomplish—struggles much more.

That person:

  • Constantly worries about what others think.

  • Falls into people-pleasing, saying yes too often.

  • Prioritizes other people’s goals above their own.

  • Plays it safe because they don’t want to fail.

  • Gets stuck in research and preparation, afraid they haven’t done enough.

Life feels like rinse and repeat. They’re not going after their dreams. Their perfectionism takes over. And because of that fear of failure and fear of disappointment, creating balance becomes much harder.

Why Self-Concept Determines Balance

Can you see the difference between the two?

Someone with an elevated self-concept has a much easier time creating balance. They can make choices without fear of failure, and without fear of what other people think.

That’s what makes balance sustainable—not just what you do with your time, but the beliefs you carry about yourself as you do it.

How the Ambitious & Balanced Program Elevates Your Self-Concept

In my Ambitious and Balanced group coaching program, I help you elevate your self-concept in two ways.

Because of how important this is, I offer you my number one daily practice to cultivate really amazing, wonderful thoughts about yourself every single day. This practice, once you get good at it, takes ten minutes or less—and it changes everything you think about yourself.

This is where you learn to think intentionally about you and your life.

I also give you a toolkit to redirect negative self-talk and negative self-concepts in the moment. So whenever you find yourself going down that rabbit hole of “I’m not enough, I’m not doing enough, I’m letting people down”, you can immediately change course and shift your thinking into something more positive and aligned with the self-concept you want.

Because the most important thoughts you think all day long—the ones that create balance—are the thoughts you have about yourself.

Your internal and external must be aligned in order to create a life that feels balanced.

Five Elevated Self-Concepts to Cultivate in 2025

I want to take the rest of our time in this episode to offer you five powerful, elevated thoughts you can start cultivating in 2025. These will make all the difference in creating a balanced life. I’ll also give you a few ways to practice them.

1. “I Already Have Everything I Need”

Oh my gosh, I love this self-concept.

So often, as high-achieving women, we believe we are missing something—that other people are faster, better, more amazing, that they’ve figured something out that we haven’t.

But instead of believing that, imagine choosing this thought:
“I already have everything I need right here to create the life I’ve always dreamed of.”

I don’t need to learn something new. I’m not missing anything. It’s all within me.

That is a powerful belief.

2. “I Don’t Settle”

The second belief I want you to cultivate in 2025 is:
“I don’t settle.”

I love this thought because it reminds me of how determined and gritty I am, and how willing I am to go after bigger goals.

This self-concept tells you: “I haven’t settled in the past, and I’m not going to settle in the future.”

So whatever challenge you’re facing today—whether it’s getting in the way of your goals or your balance—you know you will overcome it. Because you’re someone who doesn’t settle.

3. “I’m Willing to Feel Any Feeling”

The third self-concept is:
“I’m willing to feel any feeling.”

Wow, what a powerful thought.

If you’ve listened to this podcast for a while, you’ve heard me say this before: the only thing that ever gets in the way of you sticking to your priorities or holding your boundaries is a feeling you’re unwilling to feel.

And often, it’s not even the feeling—it’s the potential of the feeling. The potential guilt if you prioritize a workout instead of more family time. The potential fear of failure if you close your laptop at 5:00. The potential of letting someone down if you turn down a meeting request.

In a balanced life, you must be willing to feel all your feelings in order to stick to your priorities.

Now, my goal in Ambitious and Balanced is to help those feelings come up less often. To help your brain stop interpreting everything as failure, inadequacy, guilt, or overwhelm. And when those feelings do show up, I help you process them faster and make them feel less heavy.

4. “I’m in the Middle of Creating My Dream Life”

The fourth self-concept is:
“I’m in the middle of creating my dream life.”

For many of you, you are already living the life you once dreamed of. You have the job, the family, the money, the house—the things you always wanted. Now the next step is to allow yourself to feel happy and enjoy the life you’ve created.

Because it doesn’t matter if you have everything you thought you wanted—if you don’t feel happy, what’s the point?

And if you’re not quite where you want to be yet, that’s okay too. You’re not starting from zero. You’re not failing. You’re in the middle of it.

On a scale of 1 to 10, you’re already at a 5 or 6. That feels so much better than thinking you’re at zero, doesn’t it? You already know some things, you’ve already built some things, and you’re simply getting better at it.

You’re in the middle of creating your dream life—and that thought is both powerful and motivating.

The Final Self-Concept: “I Am Enough”

Okay, so the last self-concept I want to offer to you—and I say this a lot on the podcast, so you might even know what I’m about to say because it’s literally the backbone of creating a balanced life—is this:

“I am enough.”

You are enough.

You don’t have to do anything more to prove yourself. You don’t have to achieve anything more. You don’t need anyone to validate you. You were born enough. And nothing you do from here on out will ever change that.

That’s why this belief is so powerful. It gets you out of hustle. It gets you out of the energy of constantly needing to prove yourself.

No—you have already proven yourself. You are already worthy. You are already amazing.

So here are the five elevated self-concepts we’ve talked about:

  1. I already have everything I need.

  2. I don’t settle.

  3. I’m willing to feel any feeling.

  4. I’m in the middle of creating my dream life.

  5. I am enough.

How Do You Actually Believe These Thoughts?

At this point, you’re probably on board with these beliefs. You want to believe them. You understand how important your thoughts are in creating balance.

But the question is: how do you actually elevate yourself to believe these things?

Here’s my answer—it’s not sexy, but it’s the truth:

You practice.

Why Practice Matters

If you have a shaky self-concept right now, it’s because you’re already practicing beliefs about yourself—but they’re the wrong ones.

You’ve been practicing thoughts like:

  • “I’m behind.”

  • “I’m not good enough.”

  • “I need to prove myself.”

  • “I’m disappointing people.”

  • “I should be doing more.”

You’re practicing those thoughts every single day, and they’re making you feel terrible about yourself. That’s what drives the people-pleasing and perfectionism cycles.

So what I want for you is to start intentionally practicing thoughts. Thoughts that you want to believe. Thoughts that make you feel good.

How to Practice Elevated Thoughts

The way to get yourself to believe these elevated self-concepts is to have your brain offer them to you more frequently. And the only way to do that is to practice them—over and over, every single day.

Because your brain will always offer you the thought you’ve practiced the most. That becomes your first thought.

We want your most-practiced thoughts to be the ones that make you feel amazing, proud, joyful, and balanced.

Ways to practice:

  • Write these thoughts out daily.

  • Use an affirmations app.

  • Journal about how you already embody each of these beliefs.

  • When you feel stressed, guilty, or overwhelmed—pause and recite these thoughts to yourself.

At first, it will feel hard. But just like anything, with practice, it gets easier.

Why Doing This in a Group Is So Much Easier

Here’s the last thing I want to offer you: doing this in a group of women who are all practicing the same thoughts and going after the same goal of becoming Ambitious and Balanced makes it so much easier.

In the program, I give you a full toolkit to elevate your thoughts so you start feeling amazing about yourself every single day.

That’s why when you join Ambitious and Balanced, the shift becomes so much faster.

This Is Your Year to Elevate

So let me say this one more time for the people in the back:

The most important thoughts you think all day—the ones that have the biggest impact on your life—are the thoughts you think about yourself.

When you start elevating your self-concept and believing amazing things about yourself—regardless of your circumstances—that’s when your dream life becomes available to you. That’s when it gets easier.

I’ve walked hundreds and hundreds of women through this process of feeling confident and amazing about themselves. And I can help you, too.

Join the Next Cohort of Ambitious & Balanced

Ambitious and Balanced starts February 24th, but the doors open January 27th.

I only have 10 spots, so you’re going to want to get on the waitlist. Those on the list will be the first to hear when doors open and will receive a very special bonus when they sign up.

👉 The website to join the waitlist and learn more is:
www.rebeccaolsoncoaching.com/ambitiousandbalanced

All right working moms—until next week, let’s get to it.

Hey, working moms. I hope you enjoyed today's episode. I want to let you know that the next cohort for my group coaching program, Ambitious and Balanced, is starting soon. And if you're looking to make 2025 the year that you not just learn how to create sustainable work life balance, but you actually put it into practice so that you and your family come first without sacrificing success at your job, then this program is for you. I am only taking 10 women into this cohort and you're not going to want to miss this opportunity. Your next step to learn more is to go to the website at www.rebeccaolsoncoaching.com. group coaching. This is the year where you feel successful at both work and, home. I can't wait for you to start. I'll see you next week. And until then, let's get to it.

Rebecca Olson